the art of losing things at airports

Some may call it a unique talent. Others would say it's more of a curse - but losing random objects at airports is one of my special skills. Whether it's a cap in Kuala Lumpur or a cute MINISO water bottle in Chiang Mai, if I have an item on me while transiting through an airport, there's a good chance it won't be making the full journey.

My misplacing abilities manifested while returning to Chengdu a few years ago. As I was rushing to catch my connecting flight in Kuala Lumpur, I must have accidentally nudged my favorite cap at some point. It wasn't until I was uncomfortably adjusting to the jet's air conditioning vent blowing right on my hair that I realized my cap was nowhere to be found. I like to think that somewhere out there, a lucky Malaysian airport employee is still wearing that lost baseball cap to this day.

My troubles continued during a transit in Chiang Mai while traveling to Kochi. After a lengthy first flight, I disembarked, eager to stretch my legs. In my rush to deplane, I neglected to retrieve the fun little water bottle I had purchased at a MINISO store in Chengdu. I didn't realize its absence until hours later, rendering it lost forever in the bowels of that Airbus A321neo. Sometimes, I imagine some thirsty passenger discovering it and being pleasantly surprised by its cute design.

However, my pièce de résistance occurred in Bengaluru, where I took misplacement to breathtaking new heights. As I rushed to catch my connecting flight, I failed to notice that my wallet had slipped from my bag and lay unguarded on a departures lounge chair. It was only through a last-minute "Wait, do I have my—oh fuck!" that I doubled back and recovered the invaluable item before departure. That narrow escape still gives me chills to think about, though luckily, it supplied fodder for future "you'll never believe what almost happened" tales.

While some might see my propensity to misplace things during travel transitions as inconvenient, it adds an air of mystery and amusement.

After all, who doesn't love a good "whatever happened to that random lost item" story? As for me, I'll keep entertaining airport personnel worldwide with whatever knickknack manages to slip away from me next.

There are a few other mishaps that I decided not to include in this blog post. My wife reads this blog, and she would shit on me if she knew the full extent of things I've accidentally misplaced during travels. Just know that hats, water bottles, and wallets only scratch the surface. For the sake of marital harmony, I'll keep those stories to myself.

Consider this post an abridged version of my airport-losing skills.

Bon voyage to all the unnamed lost items!